30 June 2009

There She Goes..I'm Not Gonna Miss Her Soo...


this is the most sweetest moments that i had wif her[Fatin my sis]gd luck in Vietnam yaw!!do tc of urself down dere!!dun forget to eat!!!i noe u gt lotsa money dere..dun lie to me if u say u hve no money..haha...bye2 sis..cya in 2 mnths time!!
Hmm..hw shall i start..cz somebody gonna read this blog 4 sure..and i have to be formal tho..haha..
okok!!i got i dea!!lets start wif wat i did frm the sun starts to rise!!hehe(beware!gonna be a long one!!..haha)

ok..early in the morn arnd 7++i was awakened by Kecik boncet[my baby cat]haha..she meowed at my ears..Directly plk tu..irritating sey..den i grab her and hugged and make her into my pillow..[dah geram sgt..]haha..den she pleaded to let her go..haha..den i let her go lar..and continued sleeping..hehe..[sleepy head..haha!!]

Den!!again my sleep was interrupted..haiz..tis time by my Rash Baby..haiyo..he wished me gd morning..tats sweet bt..i was sleeping!!haha!!and Fatin asked to reply..[alamak..ni part yg malas sey..haha] so i replied to him telling him tat i cant contact wif him for the time being cz my sis wanna use the phone line for a moment before she going to Vietnam for 2 mnths..WTFISHES!!
ahaha..den i went to leep again..bt this time only afew minutes cz Nyai[nenek] dah bising suro bangun..and its like only 8 in the morn sey..haiz..bt i woke up at 9..haha..bluek!..

den after bathing..my habit in tamp jz wont go away..tat is reading newspaper before eating..i read the malay newspaper article abt husband's responsibilities during his wife giving birth..haha..its quite saddening tat some women are doing it alone..u noe y?..cz their husbands are bz sleeping while their wife fights for life and they have to suffer alone cz they dont want to wake their husbands up..and tats wat i call "jeritan sepi"...[screaming in silence]i read abt it and i was like "kiwak!!ade jgk org2 mcm ni dlm dunia ni ehk?..ish3..tk patut.."hehe..

bt b4 tat i heard ayah and nyai talking bout money issues..i was wondering..ayah kept on saying that he dont have enuf money for us..i wonder where his money go sey..kk..its true tat he have to gave it to Fatin bt tkkn smpi i dun hav money 4 sch purposes sey..rabak tu..den bile i want to search for jobs..nyai tk kasi plk..irritating sey..den..wat?..i hav to go for hunger strike is it?..klakar kapa!!!mcm mintak kene maki aje ar ni bapak..irritating nk mampui..[oops..nt suppose to say tat..hehe..terlepas dok..haha]kk.tis is jz a luahan hati ok..i dun really mean it..its jz tat i kept on thinking whr his money has gone...me n zaki dah stop mintak dier duit pe..we jz ask for sch allowance..AND my sch allowance is getting lesser day by day..and zaki is getting more!!WHAT A FAVOURISM!!not only that..i cant go to Thailand bcz of tis too..F*** lar..
Fuuuuh..lega hamba rasenye...haha...

kk..nxt..during sending my sis off..i actually wanted to hug her jz nw..bt i couldnt..cz im afraid tat i wld cry..and i noe her well..me and my sis is jz 2 yrs apart..but we have this "spiritual" connection..i cn feel wat she is feeling and she cn feel wat i am feeling..sometimes we even have the same tots..haha..coolio!..i dont want to hug her cz i noe i wld cry..and if i cry she wld cry too..soo..i jz step fierce ar..but in the end..she noes tat i wanted a hug frm her so,she hugged me..i was really close to tears man..haha..and she kissed me on the cheeks 4 the 1st time in our entire life sey!!bt too bad..its been in my habit since young tat if someone kisses me,i will surely wipe it off..haha..i dunno why..haha..so..den..after sending her off..back to tamp to take my things before alek jrg..haiyo..tiring u noe..otw to tamp..i cried in the bus..cz i noe she's crying too..i jz cn feel it..den i tried to imagine wats going to happen in the nxt 2 mnths..WAH!!!like hell..im gonna ulang alek tamp..simei and teban!!kiwak!!!Fuyoo..only god knows hw i feel...den abt kakak lagi tk balek2..i'm afraid she's running away again cz she gotta know that her bill is $200++..and the F*** thing is..its under Zaki's name..i cn bet tat she's nt gonna pay 4 it cz she dont have the money..and THIS is 1 of the major reason why i wanna work..cz i know i'm gonna need alot of money..definitely she will ask me to pay some..[sedangkn aku ngah ade difficulties in paying Fatin nye bills and oso my barang2 skola and aku rase aku tk mkn in sch 4 like three weeks to pay her bills..ni perangai dah mcm sial ehk..tpi sabar dok..COBAAN!!haha]den i have to cook meals for ayah and zaki before drg alek..wah..i'm back to my suri rumah days man!!it sucks!..to the max tau eh..tpi ape nk uat..dah nasib badan..hmm..

den bile smpi umah jrg..did some cleaning..den temankn ayah buka puase pat jrg point..den i didnt reply Rash baby's msgs cz i was engrossed in thinking wat will happen to me..too engrossed..haiyo!![sorry baby..i didnt mean to..if u marahkn me..i'm really sorry k..dun angry2 k?..I LOVE U..and i cant wait to see u..hehe..muah!!lovies!!]oh ya..Fatin was lucky cz she get to meet Rashid before going to Vietnam yesterday..she was the 1st to see..den followed by Shrek..[urghh..tat inspector nenek..haha]den no one else..huhu..[baby..im missing ur hugs..]

Den i became a match-maker in the night..haha..it was antara Sastra[my "scandal"]and Ris Nurul[my GF for life..haha]i let them talk to each other after knl2kn each other..den i went to talk to Rash baby..expressing all my love for him..haha..while waiting hw romantic cn he be..hahaha...a test tat i'll neva forget..i want to do tis since i started having guys..tpi tk dpt..haha..so..he is my victim!!1st victim!!haha..[no worries dear..no harm shall i do to u..hehe]*evil face*hehe..den talked to Fatin on Msn abt ther area there..the weather and wat time she will be waking up and start working 2mrw..[hmm..caring jgk aku ni ehk..haha!!bluek!]
and tats all i did in this one whole day dated 29th june 2009..
~the end~

P.s i love u Rashid..i really missed u nw..i was really hoping u r by my side jz nw when i cried..tats why i msged u...i miss u...

adios.amegos.peace

24 June 2009

My Love..


The blue clouds they spell out your name,
The darkest night,you shine in them..

I LOVE YOU
and I cant imagine
If you're not here with me..


It's early days but I know for sure..

That what I feel is real sincere..
Let's make this the best time of our life,

To be my better half..


I'll give you my world,
and I'll treat you nice,
Coz for my love,
I'll sacrifice..
Anything I could..
Everything I would..

MY LOVE...
You're everything I could ask for..
Your smile makes me happy..
Your tears makes me sad..
And I know for sure,
This is the best feeling I ever had..
YOU LOVE..
Brightened my dimmest light,
Make my heart beat faster than before..
And as days pass I'm gonna love you more..
And I promise....

The blue clouds they spell out your name,
The darkest night,you shine in them..
I LOVE YOU..
And I cant imagine,
If you're not here with me..

It's early days but I know for sure..
That what I feel is real sincere..
Let's make this,the best time of our life,
To be my better half..

I'll give you my world,
And I'll treat you nice,
Coz for my love,
I'll sacrifice..
Anything I could..
Everything I would..

I wanna say something to you..
There's no one else that swept me off my feet like the way you do..
And all I want is you..
I promise that our love will shine may it be with you..

MY LOVE...
You're everything I could ask for..
Your smile makes me happy..
Your tears makes me sad..
And I know for sure,
This is the best feeling I ever had..
YOU LOVE..
Brightened my dimmest light,
Make my heart beat faster than before..
And as days pass I'm gonna love you more..
And I promise...

this song i dedicate it specially to my Rashid baby..cant wait to meet u again..=)
adios.amegos.peace




Happy+Sad=?????


my sis out in cooking..haha..haiz..2dae dere was ntg special tat i did..except tat i help my sis out in the kitchen..haha..lame!
den in the afternoon whr all the things start to happen..
i went on msn..and saw Shafeeq online..so..i tegur dier ar..den at the same time ask him if he's free in the night cz in my mind was if he's free i cld take my headband as well as meet Rashid skali..and possibly Jae..luckily he said he was free till 7 plus..so..i was excited ar..lagipn dah lame gile sey tk jumpe Shafeeq..i missed him loads man..but as a fren je ar..but things start to change wen he said tat the meeting will be our last..i was sooo damn super sad sey..tats wen my memories wif him starts to play in my mind..my eyes were welling up wen he apologised abt all his wrong doings and so..i was really close to tearing man!!

den..as i talked to him thru msn..i realised that im late to meet Rashid!!haha..i was super late man!..haha..i promised to meet him at 6 but in the end i met him close to 7..haha..i really missed him..i wanted to hug him at 1st but paisey cz his fren was dere..haha..den i hurried down to Shafeeq's hse to take my headband..i tot i was late..it was himwho was late!!as usual lar dier..hmm..sampaikan Rashid dah habis mandi pn dier lom turon2 lagi sey...but i waited for him no matter what..i really wanted to see him at tat point of time..and afew minutes after Rashid arrive,Shafeeq pn turon...bt he didnt realise me..so i tegur him 1st..i jz love to call out his name..i dunno y...but as he said..life has to move on..huhu..my eyes are tearing nw!!..dun ask y..i dunno..huhu...den i tot it'll be a short meeting..but i cn see frm Shafeeq's face tat he's having alot of prob already..so i stayed wif him and Shikin..[his X1 bike] den all of sudden Rashid,Jae and Din came frm the back..Rashid was polite tho..he introduced himself to Shafeeq..i like tat..hehe..=p
nw im feeling bad cz i was soo engrossed wif Shafeeq jz nw tat i forgotten abt Rashid..alar..its jz tat i missed him lar..and i pity him..kesian dier..hutang bnyk..i feel like helping him out but i have no money...i felt soo sorry for Shafeeq..and nw he wanted to change his bike cz he said terlalu bnyk kenangan dlm motor tu..and i totally agree wif him...i really missed Shikin..jz nw wen i saw her..huhu..mcm nk nangis jek..tpi tahan woo..
den i send Shafeeq to the mrt interchange..and said our last gdbye..while walking tu,deres lots of stories we share..cant tell u..sowie..personal..haha..den..i wanted to hug him for the last time tpi he said no..cz i belong to Rashid nw..WAH!!pecah hati dok..dah lar he dont want to be my member..fren2 pn tknk..last hug pn tknk..sedih woo..nk aje i cry pat interchange tu..but tahan sey..my eyes mcm tk tahan airmata den 2 drops came out..fuh..

den i ran to Jae's hse cz i do really need support frm Rashid at tat time..i noe he's searching for me..but i..i..i dunno..no words to describe my feeling...bile msk je pat umah Jae..i saw him..he was rather looking a bit furious..but he tried to hide it..i cn totally see it..at 1st i lied to him bout whr i send Shafeeq to..but i admit at last..i dont want to lose him plk..cz he's a nice guy and shld nt to be treated badly..den i hugged him..it really soothes the heart ache tat i was feeling..im glad tat he was there..
i love u Rashid..no matter wat it is..my life is now wif u..i hope u forgive me for lying jz nw...im soo sorry Rashid..i love u..and i will always miss u..muah!

den me and his members including Jae played in the playgrnd..hahaha..tat was enjoyable..dah lame sey tk main playgrnd..haha..bt i didnt play to the max tho..cz it's jz me forcing myself so tat his members wont feel janggal towards me and i dont wanna be like his ex..den at 10+..they sent me hm..in the train..i cried thinking bout wat shafeeq said..it really hurts me cz i cznt be his fren..he's such a nice man..and i dont think he deserves a bad girl..i hope he will have a happy life ahead and bertemu dengan jodoh nye secepat mungkin..and i reached at jrg east arnd 1130 sia!!luckily sempat naik last bus..fuh..and dats all..

adios.amegos.peace

22 June 2009

Phew!!


anyone wanna blanja me go to this exhibition?..i want it badly..huhu..


me wif mr Trex..haha..

a pic of akak candid..haha!
what a day man!!hahaha.. 2day i woke up at 930.den proceed to my mission in finding a part time jobs..haha.. i went wif akak ar.. 1st was giant..den science centre..had lots of fun there..at the same time,i took a brochure on the da vinci code..haha..den went hunting jobs at GV at jrg pt..den alot more tat i cant remember..haha..
den i met a friend of akak as well as acang..his name i forgot ar..[STM!!]haha.. den went back hm..eat my sushi.. cant believe that i jz finish rounding jrg pt searching for jobs..it was tiring ok..haiz... now..for the 1st time in the entire mnth..this hse is mine!!im alone nw!!and im happy bout it!!haha.. so serene..soo peaceful..sooo lovely..haha..

btw..rashid..u are sweet too my dear..take care tau..i miss u..hehe..*blush2* haha..kk..bye!
adios.amegos.peace

Its All About Rashid..




our first ever picture together...


oweik!!haha



hey there people reading my blog..haha..
im extremely happy now cz Rashid is now minee!!hahaha...
bout Shafeeq??..well,i take his words..since he wanted to be a member only..so i let him be..and afew days later that is on the 18/06/09...i was Rashid's!!haha..everything happens super duper fast sey..it's like lightning gitu loh..haha...

kk intro bout him..
hw i get to noe him?:-thanks to Jae lar..bilang dier suro cari mataer den introduce me to him..haha..den exchange numbers..
why am i attracted to him?:-he is always dere wen i needed sumone..and he is faithful..[tats wat i noe frm Jae who's my classmate as well as his 1st ex...haha]
-he cn totally accept as who i am..i told him bout the incident bout me and shafeeq..he was shocked at first but then he counselled me in a very good way..tats gd though..
-he is a lil childish and totally into sports..tpi badan tk 'kong'..hahaha.
-lots more lar..too tired to type sey..haha..
wats his age?:-20 tis yr..
his birthday?:-21/06/1989
whr he stay?:-p.ris..forgot wat blk..haha..
his interest?:-games and soccer..[to the max punye...]
too bad bt thats all i noe ar..more info..still on going...hahaha...

btw..to my Dearie Rashid baby...
HAPPY 20TH BIRTHDAY!!
haha..i noe u will be irritated by me cz i jz cant stop myself frm wishing u birthday wishes..haha
its jz becoz i cant find u any presents..so..a thousands wishes frm me is the best resolution...haha[tipu sey a thousand wishes tu..haha]
but luckily i cn spend the entire night wif u on your birthday..thx for ajak me to ur chalet wif syafinas,hadi,syahid and hakim..they are very nice companions..nw,i noe why u call them brudders..[although most of it is ur adik-beradik..haha..so lame of me..
hw i wish i cld jz spend the entire day wif u on ur special day...haiz..
to cut it short..its jz that im missing u nw and I LUP U..haha..


haiz..2day quite sian jgk ar..alek frm chalet den kene halau umah frm my nenek cz i tonn pat chalet..sedih woo kene halau...
only god noes hw heartbroken i am..huhuhu...
den nxt week aru dpt jumpe Rashid..only get to meet him once a week..soo sad.. :(
kk..tats all ok?..dah ngantok ar..wanna sleep..nites!..


adios.amegos.peace

15 June 2009

haiz...


i really dunno wat to do nw.. something happened last thurs...and its a big one..it really had a big impact on me..i tink im really scared and paisey and im feeling really bad for shafeeq and rizal nw..i couldnt forgive myself till they really say that they forgive me straight in my face..i really dont wanna lose shafeeq nw..he has taught me alot of tings..gd ones..and i really treasure those..i really hope shafeeq would forgive me and we cld be like the times wen we first knew each other..haiz...

adios.amegos.peace

11 June 2009

What A Day Today..

HAIYO...
i dunno wat else to say...tadi i went to meet Rizal and Shafeeq..at that time i was totally hoping it would be like the normal lpk2 kinda tingy cz while waiting 4 Shafeeq me n Rizal are playing cards..mcm biase je ar..den Shafeeq came with masam muke..den i ask him like a normal fwen would ask lar..i ask him wat happened?..he diam je..den after he sits down he started scolding me..he asked me wat was my purpose saying him kental..bt my intention was jz a joke sey..den he was getting serious..and i was getting mre pissed off with him bt i maintain cool..i tried to laugh in order to tahan marah..bt in end i merajok ar..i was about to leave the place wen sumting stopped me..he said all the things he scold me was jz a joke..and i was damn pissed off wen i heard tat cz its nt the 1st time he did tat to me..its like almost everytime wen we meet he would do that to me..and it's really annoying tau..so..ape lagi the anger was already outta my control and i threw my bag on the floor and started shouting at him..i scold him saying that i dont like him doing tat to me...and i said the word "fuck"to him for the first time..and tat was the first time he seeing me getting really angry and damn it was in the public..nt only his maruah jatuh..it was also mine and innocent Rizal's..i pity Rizal cz tk psl2 dier skali kene angkut malu..haiz..nw i dunno wat to do..i've already apologized to the both of them..i hope they will forgive me and forget about wat happened..haiz..why they test me until like this sey..tk baik sungguh..aku rase kalo gini lar carenye si Shafeeq nk test pompan..aku tk sanggup lagi..aku lebih rela jadi kwn dier nw..den aku menyesal ltr bab i noe he's a big ego..nt big..GIGANTIC one..aku menyesal..pasrah dan redha..aku dah tk sanggup lagi...i'm gonna leave him as it is..eventhough its gonna be hard..i still have to move on..Shafeeq,if u r reading this..i jz wanna say sori..and thx for everything..the only thing i want frm u nw is my headband back..tk sanggup aku nk kasi org barang aku pada org yg telah aku malukn depan masyarakat..bye Shafeeq..gonna miss u..

adios.amegos.peace

10 June 2009

In Total Confusion!!


a make-up i do by myself..hehe..lawa kn aku??..haha

me n nina going to camwhore..hahaha

me in nina's room..feeling bored..

i no like tis pic cz tk lawa..hahaha..
ARGH!!!!!SOMEBODY HELP ME!!! i really dont know what to type nw cz many things are running thru my head.. 1)Shafeeq says he jz wanted to be my member..so with a sad heart i said ok.. 2)i gt to noe Shafeeq fwen named Rizal..at the same time Jae said her fwen want to knl2 with me and his name is Rashid.. 3)met Rashid jz nw..gt to know him mre..he's qiute cute bt he likes sporty gals..bt i'm nt..i like guys who play guitar..bt he doesnt..so,its like the total opposite lor..haiz..bt he's a very nice guy..i like.. 4)jz a few minutes ago..Shafeeq asked me whether i syg him or nt..so i jz say tis"i tot u said we are members?"...den he said something like"u'll neva noe wats up my sleeves..u'll neva noe till i tell u straight outta my mouth.." 5)WHAT SHLD I DO??.....STRESSED SEY...hmmm....

finally gd news..i've gt my period..hahaha..sooo..happy...weeeee.....

adios.amegos.peace